I have turned a corner today.  I handled a memory in such a way as to not having harmed myself further, but instead it was healthy and heart felt with tears and love.  It was amazing. I am giving God my heart and charging Him with the carrying of it.  He is bigger than i am, and i love Him so much.  I know He is carrying me too right now.  "Bless the Lord oh my soul, oh my soul, worship His holy name, sing like never before, oh my soul, I will worship His holy name!"
I wrote out the memory and with my sweet sister in Christ, I burned the paper.  It was amazing and I love her so much. Thank you Jesus for your tender mercies and love.