Addiction

Growling and stubborn – He sits

Branched throughout my soul

Engulfed within the workings of my flesh

He has become my master

Yet, Him I do NOT (!) love

He requires a hard and gruesome task

When left uncompleted

He inflicts pain to the soul – far beyond

The physical pain I am suffering

This devil man is in me a Tyrant!

Holding me too tight – bruising my arms

I gave my resignation

From this slavery and mental sin

I had planned to leave – yet, I am here

I stayed

Maybe I should leave; am I worthy to?

He told my ear to feed my heart poison

“Punishment for your slothful soul!” He shouted

Into my blind eyes.

Nearly 2 thousand years have I served Him.

Letting Him carry me upon a bed of dry thorns,

And rose petals.

“No one else desires your company,”

Harsh voices whisper in my dreams

While he beats my soul to the dust

Reminding me of what I am made of, and

How easy my return would be

For Him, if I leave.

Yet, I must go

Countless tears breakdown walls

That once, they themselves created – but how?

From my prison, I see a rainbow

Just outside the window

I have been out there before, Never stayed.

This is my home

I love Him, and He loves me – but

I can’t love myself

He gets jealous.

I fear being without Him.

I’ve been with Him for so long.

Still, death hath visited with Him oft.

Perhaps He will soon sell me

To this visitor his friend

Then finally all this pain and

Anguish from my heart

Will vanish with my empty soul.